LISTENING WORKS WONDERS

I was talking to a friend of mine at the gym yesterday whose mother and father had recently been put into aged care. His father has advanced dementia and his mother keeps telling him how sad she is being away from her home and how she hates the aged care facility. My...

EARLY RISING

People often ask me why at 71 years of age I choose to get out of bed at 5am on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and head for the gym, particularly since I’m retired and could go anytime. One reason is, that I find getting out of bed at 5a.m. three days a week gives me a...

SELF SABOTAGE

Most people have dreams, things they’d love to do. However many people fear failure, so they sabotage their opportunities, rather than face the possibility of failure. But the biggest failure of all is staying the same, staying stuck and allowing oneself to stagnate....

MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS

The notion of an ideal marriage springs from fairy tales. Can you imagine Cinderella and Prince Charming having ding dong argument? In fairy tales marriages are supposed to be happy all the time. The thing is happiness is not a permanent state. It is a transient...

LET YOURSELF BE SEEN

The other day at the gym I noticed one of my friends sitting on a gym machine looking very glum indeed. I went over to him and asked him how he was. “Oh I don’t know,” he replied, “I’ve just come back from a holiday in Spain with my partner and I didn’t really enjoy...

GO FOR IT!

In my years as a psychologist I have seen people run back to a position of pain, suffering and disappointment, just to appease their childhood beliefs. I have seen people sabotage their opportunities and sabotage their happiness just so they can be in synch with what...